We are preparing to celebrate Thanksgiving, a time set aside that we gather, eat, and spend time focusing on thankfulness.

Too often though it becomes more about the gathering and eating than the thankfulness. And that brings stress, pressure, and a bunch of feelings that look nothing like a thankful heart.

I know this because this is me.

This year is the first Thanksgiving I will celebrate after my dad died.

We moved out of state about eight years ago, so I didn't usually spend the day with him, though I will definitely miss hearing his voice on the phone.

But I keep trying to remember the our last Thanksgiving together before we moved, and I can't.

To be honest, I don't really remember any Thanksgiving with him as an adult.

This makes me really sad.

So today I want to share that with you...Because it doesn't have to be that way.

I know it is hard to not stress about the food, or the messy house.

I know it is hard to not worry about who might say what at the dinner table.

But I encourage you to try. Because honestly, though those things feel really big right now...one day they won't. They will be so insignificant that you won't even remember them.

And if you let them take over your day...you might not even remember that either.

I know my dad loved me and he knew I loved him, but I sure wish I could remember our last Thanksgiving together.

So this year I'm ditching the parts of the day that are stressful and embracing what brings us joy and what cultivates thankfulness.

This year I am going to really focus on Colossians 4:2 "Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful."

I'm going to devote my day to thankfulness instead of trying to have everything look and taste perfect.

I'm going to pay attention to the laughter, sights, sounds, and smells.

And dwell in thankfulness for the moment. Whatever it ends up looking like.

And one day, I pray my girls will be able to look back and remember that.